48 hours ago, i was on the brink of a very severe OCD episode; i was eating almonds compulsively and trying to memorise the spanish dictionary. if not for the fact that i was talking to mark on the phone, i would have also gone ahead to read every economist issue i have in the house, and that would have even included the business sections. mark was trying to get me to buy his philosophy- that you should enjoy yourself fully before the results so that if it's bad, you'd have had your fun, and if it's good, you can continue to have your fun. i of course subscribe to the other school of thought, which is- worry whenever you can, whenever you can. it's the tried and tested way to bipolar disorder.

in the morning of results day, we decided to watch i not stupid too, which turned out to be a surprisingly good choice because by the end of it we were completely numb to the pressures of the singapore school system. haha gotcha! i was a complete nervous wreck anyway and spent half the movie imagining what 4Bs would look like on paper. if anything, it was more like mental fatigue because the show just seemed to drag on and on for 2 hours, which seemed like eternity compared to the half hour separating us from the moment of revelation. for the record, the movie is definitely not as good as the prequel, and there are just too many emotionally charged scenes that you get kinda sick of seeing the same characters crying and screaming and behaving like typical singaporeans.

of course by the time i was one person away from collecting my results, i had worked myself into hyperventillation and my heart was on fire. it didn't help that i had already seen half my class getting straight As, especially since unlike a dearest person, i don't have the unique ability to just "squeeze an A out of every paper". the bitch radar was definitely operative and i felt like kicking every person who was saying, nonchalantly, that he got 4As. boohoo, i'm so ashamed for being mean spirited.

anyway, when it was my turn i naturally started to cry when i saw the paper but thankfully vanity got the better of me and i stopped myself before i made a mess on my face. i vaguely recall miss hor trying to say something to me but obviously i didn't hear a word since it was already a huge stretch to pick up the pen and sign against my name. afterwards, when i called my mom i started off by asking her "remember you said you'd still love me regardless?", which was payback for all the april fools jokes she's played on me. and then when she heard my results SHE started to cry. this is one of the benefits of having everybody think that you're stupid, i suppose. it becomes a lot easier to Do Your Best when they have low expectations of you.

so, six months of shit and that's what it boiled down to.

apart from results, the week has been quite packed with other stuff!

on saturday, mark and i had a major pigging out at billy bomber's. we had ribs and steak and this extremely thick and sweet vanilla milkshake which came in this HUGE metal flasky thing which the waiter actually shakes in front of you. but what killed us was the nachos. the first bowl they brought was so drowned in cheese that half of them became too soggy to be eaten. so we complained very nicely and they brought us a second bowl, with the cheese and salsa in separate side bowls. and the funny thing about this bowl of nachos was that it seemed to NEVER END, and halfway through it both of us were dying. but we felt really bad to leave the chips there because we'd complained and all, so we tried to hide the chips in the cheese and salsa bowls. it was quite funny ;p

on monday, i had the first driving lesson of my entire life in which i didn't stall the car once! it was a mammoth achievement. i seem to actually be getting the hang of the clutch, which is good news because it means that i now have more brain space to focus on not mounting kerbs or knocking people down at traffic junctions.

on tuesday, i met mandy and co for a last supper. before that, i was shopping with aud at paragon, and we kinda forgot to check the time. which was when mandy called us and told us in her pissed sounding voice to get ourselves there now. if you know mandy, you'd have been scared too. anyway that's how me and aud practically ran from paragon to plaza in record time. and, later on in the evening, we ended up walking back to far east with mitch, although this proved to be a good thing because i managed to buy a pair of sunglasses (for driving!) and so end my dry spell. somehow now that i'm working i don't feel like buying anything anymore because i think of how hard i've worked to earn that money, and this leads to a vicious cycle of me feeling unfulfilled from shopping trips and then needing to shop more to get over that feeling.

today, i had driving again in the morning but i was a bit stoned and so i had a lot of near accidents. the U-turns in particular were horrendous because my instructor kept telling me to look at the road ahead and not at the kerb, and as a result i turned into the wrong lane a few times, panicked, and accelerated in mid-turn a few other times. seriously, this instructor can be quite irritating. but i guess she has kept me miraculously safe until now so she must have some good karma after all.

in the afternoon, i attempted to get sunlight to improve my vitamin D absorption. so i lay out the yoga mat in the garden and went to sleep. but it was so hot that i could practically feel my brain frying, and every few minutes an ant would try to crawl up my legs and i would have to get up and brush it off. i have no idea how people can tan on a regular basis. it's unbearable; i hate the sun. after that i went for an evening jog around the estate, and as luck would have it, i managed to take the wrong route by accident and ended up running more than i intended to.

and now, it's time to catch up on grey's anatomy and american idol!