i just came back from pilates, and am in Pain. of course, the Deep Pain will only begin tomorrow, and will thereafter be replaced by A Dull Ache That Is My Excuse Not To Exercise For The Rest Of The Week. don't judge me- my instructor today was BRUTAL. he got us to do the whole class with hand weights, went overtime, and ended off with a series of what he calls 'pilates push-ups'. basically they involve doing repetitive sets of push ups with your elbows tucked close to your sides, so that all the weight is on your triceps. and if anybody like tried to slack, we all had to start the sets from the beginning. I TOTALLY HATE PUSH-UPS! omg like hello, i'm a girl! why the hell would i want to have huge triceps??? and more importantly, when will i ever need to have strong arms??? the only kind of push-ups girls ever need to do are the kinds where you can bend your knees and stick your elbows way out to the side, ie the real pussy ones.

anyway, the only thought that sustained me through all the torture was that tchachina must never have complained when she had to do push-ups. the only difference between me and tchachina is that tchachina's body is tall, thin, muscular and incredibly flexible. since the obvious problem here is that i've already stopped growing and will therefore never be as tall as her, i have concluded that i will never be tchachina :( oh wells.

at the beginning of last year joseph and the guys used to mention that i should stop gymming so much as i was getting really bulky arms. hah! that is certainly no longer the case. whatever muscles i might have once had have already atrophied, and all that remains are layers of flab. but this must change! as you can see, constant repitition of 'this must change!' is my new motivational tactic. in fact i can apply it to every aspect of my life. when faced with piles of unread notes: 'this must change!', when faced with a messy study table: 'this must change!', when faced with a consuming feeling of laziness that prevents me from getting out of bed to do any work: 'this must change!', etc. i really ought to get myself that threadless shirt that reads: "PROCRASTINATORS: LEADERS OF TOMORROW". the irony just kills me, hurrhurr.